Does saving yourself for marriage guarantee great sex? Saving yourself for marriage to a great extent guarantees a happy marriage and offers an opportunity to enjoy intimacy with your spouse. The reason being you are not introducing strange sexual experiences from your past relationship into the marriage bed.
There’s a reason why society values virginity, and I want to make it clear that being a virgin doesn’t benefit God, it benefits you and offers you the best opportunity to have of fulfilling marriage and sex life with your spouse. Obedience to the word of God is directly proportional to our success in every aspect of life.
Related: Can you marry someone who is not a virgin?
Even though society does not put much value on men’s virginity, it is wise for men to remain pure as well. There are no double standards with God.
Why save yourself for marriage?
The moment you engage in premarital sex you are destroying your soul and risking your future for temporal pleasures.
Proverbs 6:32-33
He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself. He will get wounds and dishonor, and his disgrace will not be wiped away.
Proverbs 9:17
“Stolen water is sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.” But he does not know that the dead are there, that her guests are in the depths of Sheol.
These strange sexual experiences always hinder you from enjoying your spouse. For example, if as a woman you have fornicated with six men before marriage, each of which has a different penis size and girth, this makes it difficult to settle for what your husband can offer you.
However, if it is your first time with your spouse you will be fully satisfied as this is what he has introduced you to, a new pure experience. You will have no reference to make comparisons. Sparing you the temptation of committing adultery and dishonoring your body, your spouse, and Christ. The same is true for men.
I am by no means condemning those who are not virgins but stating the benefits of remaining pure until marriage. A simple piece of advice is “do not awaken love until it is so desires”. (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5)
Being pure reduces the possibility of divorce in marriage. Today the two causes of divorce are money and sex. Sex is becoming an issue because one of the couple or both brought into the marriage bed strange previous sexual experiences which in turn define the sacredness of the marriage bed. For example, your husband starts forcing you into sexual acts which you deem inappropriate and ungodly, such as anal sex, role-play, and the use of sex toys to spice your marriage.
The woman on the other hand, due to previous experiences, starts dominating a husband in the marriage bed and demands sex positions that the husband is not comfortable with.
Sex in marriage is an art and the couple should seek to grow together intimately without pressuring each other. The goal of sex in Christian marriage should always be to meet your spouse’s needs, as sex is an act of service to your spouse and worship to God.
Philippians 2:3-4
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
To those who lost their virginity, “put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires.” (Ephesians 4:22-24).
Further Reading; Ephesians 5:3-13, Romans 8:1-11, Galatians 5:1, 5:13, 5:16-17, 5:24, 6:7-9, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6, 1 Corinthians 6:12, 6-15-20, 5:16-17, Romans 6;1, 7:1-25, Matthew 5:27-30, Proverbs 4:23, 5:15-20, 8:13.
Does saving yourself for marriage guarantee great sex? What are your thoughts?
